ICE PARTNERS
(A MUSICAL MYTH)
Provided by the Muse of the Most Grateful and Humble
HARVEY J MACFARQUAR
Dear Readers:
A few words, please, before we embark on our adventure through Ice Partners (A Musical Myth). I cannot truly express the excitement, the wondrous air of expectancy I felt when I first communicated to another living being the germ of the idea which was to blossom into Ice Partners (A Musical Myth). Dear readers, when I finally gave voice to this mysteriously inspired story, this other-wordly feast for the senses (and the soul!), I knew this subconscious rumination had been instilled in me from perhaps birth itself, that it had always lain dormant inside, just waiting for the right time to spread its wings and take flight out one of my orifices, born into a world, though not quite perfect, which could at least be enriched by the art that is Ice Partners (A Musical Myth). Yes, gentle reader, from that first day, those first words! the very genesis of the long and rewarding journey that was to take me not only on an exacting search for the very essence of ice dancing, but also took me on a trek inward, to discover what strange and wonderful creation was practically bursting from my very being, I knew this was the fulfillment of something not entirely of my own power, something pushing me (head first!) towards the fruition of an event that I fully expect to be the crowning achievement of my artistic, and even spiritual, life. Yes from those very first words, uttered slowly and almost sensually, "I have an idea about ice dancers," I knew what destiny, be it heaven or hell, good or bad, black or white, awaited me. That destiny was, no, is, to write, direct, and perform for you
ICE PARTNERS!
(A MUSICAL MYTH)!
Oh, sound the trumpets, generous reader! And beat the drums, too! For now we most certainly will embark on our journey, to a land full of mystery, drama, excitement, and of course, ice! But fear not, for though the setting is frigid, ICE PARTNERS (A MUSICAL MYTH), will warm your soul where the cold numbs it, brighten areas of your being which have faint seen the sun's own light, and nourish a heart's hungry yearning for strong food and drink on a blustery and barren day. Please, wise reader, prepare yourself to ponder, cry, laugh at, delight and argue over, and of course, be transported in a way that only a fine musical myth can, by ICE PARTNERS (A MUSICAL MYTH). Now, enjoy, Enjoy, ENJOY!
Your faithful and humble Author
Harvey J MacFarquar
by
Harvey J MacFarquar
The curtain rises on a nameless barren and frozen park in the dead of winter. In the middle of the stage is a lake, which is frozen over with ice. To the left of the lake is a bench and a large oak tree, with the initials D.J. and N.S. carved inside a big heart. To the right is a small stand with the words "Hot Chocolate" painted on the front in prominent but unprofessional looking lettering.
DOUG JACKSON, WEARING A WOOLEN HAT WITH A FRIZZY "SNOWBALL" ON TOP, WALKS HESITANTLY AND WITH A SLIGHT LIMP INTO THE FOREGROUND FROM STAGE LEFT.
DOUG: (Shivering) Brrr, it's cold again. Boy, wish Gramps Nyborg had his hot chocolate stand open today. DOUG SITS ON THE BENCH AND PUTS HIS HEAD IN HIS HANDS, STARING OUT THOUGHTFULLY ONTO THE LAKE. (Muttering) This old lake, boy, this old lake.
FROM STAGE RIGHT, GRAMPS NYBORG ENTERS, HOLDING A LARGE JUG WHICH APPEARS TOO HEAVY FOR HIM. HE HOISTS IT ONTO HIS STAND, HUFFING AND PUFFING.
GRAMPS NYBORG: (To himself) Phew! Seems like this hot chocolate gets heavier every year.
DOUG: (Calling over to him) Must be the marshmallows, oldtimer!
GRAMPS: (Startled) By golly! Doug, you gave me a fright, you scoundrel. What's a young buck like you doing out here on a godforsaken day like this?
DOUG: Oh, I don't know Gramps. The solitude, I guess.
GRAMPS: Solitude. Hmmph. I say too much solitude in someone your age is not good for the soul. Too much thinking about the past, well, it just ain't right.
HEY EVERYONE, CHILLED DOWN TO YOUR VERY SKATE BLADES? IF NOT, YOU CAN STILL ENJOY A HOT CHOCOLATE OR OTHER SNACK TREAT. SEND $4.00 TO HARVEY AT 2256 MARKET STREET, APT C AND GET A FREE PACKET OF GRAMPS NYBORG'S DELICIOUS COCO!
DOUG: Oh, c'mon Gramps. You out here every day like you are, hustling hot chocolate, you must watch the lake sometime.
GRAMPS: Well, Doug, I can't say that I don't. That lake and me, we're old friends, but let me tell you something now, something maybe a young buck like you don't understand. You watch that lake too long and too hard, you start to see things.
DOUG: See things, Gramps?
GRAMPS: That's right, to be sure. You see things, and feel things too, that maybe oughtn't to be seen and felt by the likes of mortal men.
DOUG: What do you mean?
GRAMPS: Well, I don't think I can rightly say now.
DOUG: Why, Gramps, you're sure talking strange today. What's gotten into you?
GRAMPS: (Angering some) Nothing's gotten into me! I'm trying to teach you something, that's all!
DOUG: Hey, Gramps, take it easy. I've never seen you like this before. Why don't you rustle me up one of your special hot chocolates.
GRAMPS: (Resigned) All right, Doug, all right. (He attends to making the hot chocolate) THE LIGHTING DIMS ON GRAMPS.
DOUG: Boy, Gramps is talking strange today. Still, there is something about this lake. Sometimes I stare into it, and I get lost, thinking about things. And then it's like it's beckoning me. Calling me to a strange and mysterious world. LIGHTING DIMS ON DOUG, AND GOES UP ON GRAMPS.
GRAMPS: He doesn't believe about the lake. Well, maybe he's right. Maybe I should just sell my hot chocolate and stop imagining things.
MUSIC SLOWLY RISES. LIGHTS DOWN ON GRAMPS, UP ON DOUG.
DOUG: I look into it, and I see myself last winter.
LIGHTS UP ON GRAMPS. HE SPEAKS AS HE POURS HOT CHOCOLATE.
GRAMPS: (Half sing-song, to the rising music) But I think he sees it, I think he sees it. I think he understands the lake.
DOUG: (Taking up the song) There is something strange, something very strange, something real real strange about this lake.
GRAMPS: (Now in full song)
I Knew I wasn't crazy.
Wasn't crazy.
There is something
that he sees
DOUG:
What's it showing me
What's it want me to see?
Or is this stuff about the lake
just a mistake?
GRAMPS:
Did I make a mistake
To make
Doug awake
People will say Gramps is
just a flake
Oh the people come and go
But only when it snows
Hot chocolate is all they want
They never want to stop and talk
Then they say to me
Gramps I am thirsty
I need something warm and sweet
I need your delicious
hot chocolate treat
And that is all they see
When they look at me
Gramps needs company
DOUG:
Oh Gramps is just crazy
what's he done to me?
now I must participate
about this crazy thing with the lake
I stare and I can see
what was history
there I am I'm skating fast
Nancy's there I wave and I'm past
round and round I go (DOUG STANDS LIKE HE IS WATCHING WHAT HE IS DESCRIBING)
Nancy's screaming so
I was such a young gay blade
I really thought I had it made
THE LIGHTS DIM THEN RISE AGAIN. GRAMPS IS GONE, AND DOUG IS SKATING ROUND AND ROUND THE LAKE, SINGING. A PRETTY YOUNG WOMAN WITH MEDIUM SIZED BREASTS IS WATCHING, ROOTING DOUG ON.
I pass her once again
She is my best friend
But that is not enough for me
I sure wish she would sleep with me
When I'm in the Olympics, then we'll see
NANCY:
Doug is skating fast
I hope he can last
(She shouts out, not in song:)
Oh, Doug!
Oh I like the way he skates
I'm sure glad I am his date
Though I'm not sure what he wants
It makes me feel important
LIGHTS RISE IN THE CORNER OF THE STAGE ON GRAMPS NEAR HIS STAND
GRAMPS:
Doug you're going much too fast
I do believe that you will crash
DOUG:
I think I have lost control
I am such a darned a-hole
Why did I have to impress Nancy
by trying to skate so fancy schmancy?
NANCY:
I think he should slow down
Lest I wear my funeral gown
(Calls out, not singing:)
Slow down, Doug!
If he crashes I'll just die
On him so I do rely
HEY, KIDS, DOUG MAY SKATE TOO FAST, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO DRINK AND DRIVE. REMEMBER, DRINKING AND DRIVING IS JUST PLAIN DUMB (This public service announcement paid for by Ida B. Fleming, in loving memory of her son, Julius)
GRAMPS:
Oh, by gosh he's going to crash
All his brains he will mash
If I've seen it once I've seen it twice
When will these damn kids
respect the ice?
DOUG:
My god it's like I'm in a trance
I've ruined myself and all for Nance
I just hope I don't have an accident
in my pants
GRAMPS:
(Shouts out, not singing:)
Balance boy, balance!
(To himself) He's a dead man.
NANCY: Oh my God Doug do watch out!
DOUG: I'm going to crash I have no doubt!
HE LOSES BALANCE AND SHOOTS OFF OF THE LAKE, CAREENING INTO GRAMPS'S STAND, KNOCKING CUPS OF HOT CHOCOLATE TO AND FRO.
DOUG: Ahh!
GRAMPS: My God, boy!
NANCY: (Running to him) Oh, Doug!
GRAMPS:
(Singing) I told you boy you were goin' too fast
knockin' over my chocolate
you want I should sell demitasse?
NANCY:
(Singing) Oh, Gramps don't scold him
He's hurt himself
Doug, speak to me
How's your health?
DOUG:
(Singing) Ouch that hurt so
I'm such a fool
Gramps you were right
As usual
GRAMPS:
Okay, boy, now quiet down
We'll get some help
from the town
I didn't mean to make no insinuations
This ain't no time for recriminations
DOUG: Thanks, Gramps!
NANCY: Doug!
GRAMPS:
Being right, now such a hollow victory
It's not always what it's cracked up to be.
DOUG TRYS TO SAY SOMETHING, BUT INSTEAD, FAINTS. GRAMPS IMMEDIATELY TAKES HIS PULSE.
GRAMPS:
Oh, God in heaven, there's no beat!
Now the tragedy is complete!
NANCY: Doug, speak to me!
GRAMPS: (shaking his fist at sky)
What have you done, creator!
Oh, catastrophe!
I loved that boy
Loved him a ton
His hot chocolate
Always with cinnamon
Do you accept PayPal? What about discounts for especially well-behaved individuals?
Posted by: Molly | February 15, 2007 at 10:23 AM